Purely Grateful.

So my "brilliant blog idea" turned sour. Not because I had a hard time doing it, but because I didn't do it at all. So I've given up on my idea for "blog plans" altogether. I'll just write what I feel. :)


Sooo today was a roller coaster of emotions:

I woke up feeling okay. And then Nikita left for work. I was so ridiculously bummed for the next hour. So many thoughts going through my head. And I completely blame my period. It has never gotten this bad, but sweet Lord above it was ridiculous! Nothing even worth being sad about. Between nostalgia and pure disdain, oy. Sad day.

Then it got worse. My sister picks me up to take me to work and on our way we both broke down. Hysterically crying with each other. Not only is she pregnant, but the father isn't helping her situation. Between being angry with him and feeling soooo empathetic for Kendra, I couldn't hold my tears anymore. And by the time I got to work my face was a mess. It was a good thing I wasn't wearing any makeup today because it would've been ALL over my face! So I go into the store, still crying hysterically and my boss is completely floored. I've never gotten upset in front of him and I'm sure he knew it was something bad. After I walked by Nick, still sobbing, he came into the bathroom with me and hugged me, told me everything would be okay. Buy the tears kept flowing. It was as if his support and comfort just made it worse. He's just so good to me, and always there for me. I can't believe I ended up with someone so wonderful. 

The work day was just what I needed to keep my mind off life. And by the time I was off I felt so much better. Which is new for me. I'm usually angry with the world by the time I get off work. But not today...that just shows how bad my day was going. 

When I got home, I gained all the motivation in the world. I cleaned like crazy. No joke.

So now I lay in my bed. Completely blown away by what surrounds me. A roof over my head, two adorable dogs sleeping at my side, one of the best friends I have chillin' in a room down the hall, who I feel comfortable with beyond belief, and the most amazing boyfriend who cares more for me than I could ever deserve. That being said, I'll sleep extremely peacefully tonight. Dogs, boyfriend, and all. <3

Goodnight world. :)

God Exists

I was sliding throughout past text messages today when I stopped on an old friends number. I read only our last conversation, which consisted of now more than 2 messages, from Valentines Day..3 months ago. We hadn't spoken to each other in 12 weeks...where does time go? The conversation is sad...talking only about our drifting friendship and how much we miss each other. I couldn't stop wishing we'd come back together and become as close as we were before.

And the weirdest thing happened...

An hour later I got a text. I saw the little whale emoji next to her name and I smiled. She texted me, telling me how much she missed me and was coming to visit this upcoming weekend. I couldn't believe it. Its like God heard my thoughts and made it happen. I'm excited to finally catch up with this extremely dear friend of mine this Sunday. :)


God...You are oh so good. :)

Me, Myself, and I.

So it hit me today.

I realized something.. It's how critical I am about myself. I seriously think negative thoughts about myself everyday. All the time. Typically i think about how I look fat, my nose is big, my hair is crazy, I'm too stupid, blah. All bad stuff. But today I started thinking about how I have all these different sides of myself. I'm shy at times, I'm crazy sometimes, I can be sexy, or sweet, confident or self conscious. Smart and completely clueless. I am a really well rounded person. And when I thought good things about myself..I realized how weird it was for me to be thinking positive thoughts. Constantly I criticize things I say or do, or the way I look.

So this is my idea...

I've been looking for an idea of something to blog about. And this just came to me. I could keep an update on my life..in thinking positively about myself. As soon as I think something negative I'll try to stop and think positively instead. It'll be like a challenge to myself.

So goodnight all. I'll update you on day 1 :)


Wish me luck!

ZOMBIES!!

Call of Duty probably causes more issues between couples than anything else. I seriously cannot stand watching Nick play zombies. And it seems that this game has brainwashed every guy. Soo...let's just sue the company that mass produces the game. k?

Jerks. :P